IT Witticisms III

Some more IT related witticisms for your enjoyment:

1. You want the data? You can't handle the data!
2. That's the best part of all, my code is self-documenting.
3. I can unfix it...
4. Our thin client is a mere 32 diskettes.
5. Inside every fat client is a thin client screaming to get out.
6. Thin Client Plus--It's like small, only bigger.
7. Our client may not be thin, but it's smart!
8. Blade...that's a much cooler name than “skinny server.”
9. What meeting were you in?
10. You guys need to get yourself a white board or something.
11. A bug is just a feature growing in the wrong place.
12. If I don't state the obvious, who will?
13. Uh-oh, I think I found some more irrational exuberance in our code base.
14. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.
15. I'm not passing the buck, I'm re-raising the exception.

If you have any witty or interesting comments of your own, please share them with us.

The sky is no longer the limit!

Actually, this is exactly what I thought about Delphi 1. It was the most liberating and innovative product of the 1990's and with the resurgence of Delphi via CodeGear, Delphi 2007 is once again the premiere WIN32 development platform bar none. I can not imagine anyone daring to write Windows apps with anything other than Delphi.

I've been using Delphi 2007 now for about 2 weeks, and I can honestly say its as fast as a jet and as solid as a tank. I have not had a single mishap with the IDE. All of my Delphi 2006 3rd party components work in Delphi 2007 flawlessly. As soon as I was done installing the 3rd party components, I was able to compile my Delphi 2006 apps without any troubles at all. I was totally amazed at how easy it was (as a precaution, please be sure to make backups of your projects before attempting this).

if you are not using Delphi 2007 already, It's a must have upgrade. I highly recommend it. Oh, did I forget to mention the new help system? It's Impressive. The new help system alone is worth the upgrade. For those still using Delphi 2005 and 2006, you will be pleasantly surprised.

Houston, we have a solution!

IT Witticisms II

Some more IT realted witticisms for your enjoyment:

1. "Goof" means it could happen to anyone; "idiot" means you're someone special.
2. Please answer the question--Did you, or did you not, write the code in question? Null, your honor.
3. The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
4. What’s Proof of Technology? It’s POT for managers.
5. Clear the cache and do the dance.
6. Developers are like slinkey's...kind of worthless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
7. Programming is an art form that fights back.
8. Too bad we're not on a “want-to-know” basis.
9. That's almost enough to make me wish I was in management again.
10. There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those who know binary, and those who don't.
11. I was in a festive mood when I came in.
12. BYOS - Bring Your Own Specs.
13. Fortunately there's always another sinking ship to jump to.
14. But, I didn't change anything.
15. It works on my machine.
16. All pointers corrupt, and absolute pointers corrupt absolutely.
17. Most of our optimism can be attributed to a lack of pattern recognition.

If you have any witty or interestng commenets of your own, please share them with us.

How you get there does matter

I had this inspiration earlier today when I was thinking about various ways to promote Delphi 2007. As I was musing, it occurred to me the software development process is a type of journey. As with all journeys, there is a destination and how you get there really does matter. Delphi has allot of wow factor, and she is a real head turner like the Bugatti Veyron. Delphi also shares a unique distinction with the Bugatti Veyron: They are the fastest and most powerful production models in their respective fields. They are both first-in- class and best-in-class with no equals only rivals.

I decided to write some catchy tag lines which best describe the Delphi 2007 experience. The following are my top 10 tag lines for Delphi 2007:

1. Getting there is all the fun.
2. When you have the need for speed.
3. When you really, absolutely, have to get it done on time.
4. So easy a caveman could use it.
5. Sophisticated yet powerful.
6. She's street legal.
7. You haven't lived until you've seen Delphi 2007 running at 220 mph.
8. Who knew programmers could be so productive?
9. Drive fast, drive hard, drive long, Delphi 2007 can take you there.
10. The fast and the furious.

Bonus tag lines:

1. Vulcans use Delphi 2007 - that's why they live long and prosper.
2. No blinking or you'll miss it.
3. If the Romans used Delphi, Rome would have been built in a day.
4. Delphi 2007 is the missing link.
5. High octane fuel for the Enterprise.
6. 4 out of 5 Dentist recommend it.
7. Never go to work without it.
8. It's everywhere you need to be.
9. Resistance is futile.
10. Delphi 2007 is where the future of technology begins.
11. Where RAD is simply done.
12. What's in your computer?
13. Delphi 2007 is the "A" game.
14. Programmer tested, manager approved.
15. Delphi 2007 JIT for Vista.
16. For those who think outside the box.
17. Delphi 2007 is for the bold and not the feint of heart.
18. Lead, follow, or get the hell out of the way! Delphi 2007 is coming through.
19. Delphi 2007 is a "No Toil Zone."
20. No rules, just right.

If you have any catchy tag lines, please share them with the rest of us.

IT Witticisms I

Some IT realted witticisms for your enjoyment:

1. I like Deadlines. They make a loud whistling sound when they fly by.
2. It's not a bug, it's a feature.
3. It's not the App, it's the data!
4. The good news is that I have plenty of errors I can reproduce.
5. You say "cartesian join" like it's a bad thing.
6. Boot early, boot often.
7. I've given up logic for lent.
8. Code as I say, not as I code.
9. When you lament painting yourself into a corner, remember -- it's only paint.
10. I must have been hallucinating most of Friday, but it's so hard to tell the difference between that and working with .NET.
11. Windows programmer or "Ground Hog's Day" movie aficionado, it's hard to tell.
12. So, what's your point?
13. Life's too short to work with Microsoft products.
14. If you don't boot Windows in safe mode, are you running in unsafe mode?
15. Unencumbered by the thought process.

If you have any witty or interestng commenets of your own, please share them with us.

CodeGear's CodeRageous Event

As many of you probably know, CodeGear's CodeRage was held March 12 - 16. Aside from a few technical difficulties early on, I think it was a resounding sucess. The sessions were very informative and professionally done, and I look forward to the next CodeRage.

Its pretty clear, CodeGear is "where developers matter." The mood and focus now is much different than it has been in the past when it was Borland. Borland always seemed a little too monolitic and detached for the average programmer. CodeGear is changing all that because it's where developers do matter.

They are still in tansition from the old to the new. There are some growing pains of course, and placing orders online for CodeGear software seems to have its challenges as well. I tried to order "Delphi for PHP" from their on-line store last Friday, but could not get my coupon for a 25% discount to work. Its seems others had the same problem. I got an email asking me to complete my order, but I do not know how to get my discount and I am afraid it has already expired. No matter, I will still order it when its ready. I have bought every version Delphi (you heard me: that includes 4, 8, 2005 as well) since Delphi 1.

Mistakes and glitches will happen or course. Its part of life. It's never if you will make a mistake because you certainly will, Its about how well you handle the mistakes you make. so with that in mind many Kudos to Micheal Swindell, VP Product Management for his tireless efforts to personally resolve the ordering and downloading issues some developer' experienced this past weekend. He epitomizes the spirit of where developers do matter. You can go to his blog and see for yourself: http://blogs.codegear.com/michaelswindell/archive/2007/03/16/33096.aspx.

With the advent of Delphi 2007 for WIN32 so begins another chapter in the Delphi wars "The Return of the King."

How I became a Delphi Centurion

During the fall of 1994 whispers and rumors of a new RAD development tool code named Delphi aka "VB Killer" was swirling around a project I was working on for the US Dept of State and USAID. One of the developers on our project was a beta/field tester for Delphi. He gave me and several others a quick demo of the new development tool.

The Idea that I could create a full featued application and distribute a single exe with no dependencies and essentially zero configuration issues was unbelievable, extremely appealing and absolutely liberating. We were retooling an entire federal government agency using VB 3 and Oracle 7.x. Now try that on for size - talk about fits and starts, cold sweats, and nightmares and that was just the first day.

I was hooked from that moment on. I never looked back and I've never had any regrets about becomming a Delphi Centurion. I pre-ordered my copy of Delphi in Februrary of 1995 and it arrive with all its glory in March of the same year. Little did I know nor did I imagine 12 years later I would be sitting here anxiously awaiting the release of Delphi 2007 for Win 32.

And in March 1995 so began The Delphi Wars...